Friday, December 5, 2014

I’m Not You… You’re Not Me…



Hello again from the Muzings of Suze!  Tonight I was combing through the message boards of a site I've become involved with and I realized with a mix of horror and irritation that I was doing something I swore I’d never do through this journey- I was comparing my progress with other people.  I found that at one point, I wasn't really even reading the posts, but rather I was looking at their posted profile information and seeing when their surgery was, and how much weight they’d lost.  

Bad idea.

The rational, scientific part of my mind knows what a foolish proposition this is.  After all, I’m the one who’s been saying ad nauseum that everyone’s experience is different…this journey will be unique to each of us.  And yet there I was, curling my lip.  “That person had their surgery the same month as me…how come they lost 50 pounds and I've only lost a little over 20?”  “That person said they can barely get 3 ounces of food in them & I can score 4 ounces with no problem?”  Oh, what a slippery slope I was heading down.

It’ll be no epiphany to any of you that being overweight in today’s airbrushed society is hard.  Add to that the stark truth of being nestled into my mid-40’s, and some days it gets downright depressing.  Even if I do (Did I say “if”?  I meant “when”!) lose my excess weight, I’ll still never be what the girl on the cover of Cosmopolitan is.  It’s really a shame what our society promotes as the standard of beauty, isn’t it?  I give major props to companies like Dove and Mayfair who use real looking women to advertise their products, but you know what’s sad?  To go into a plus-sized store (I could name names, but I won’t) and see the clothes gathered and pinned onto regular sized models!  Talk about setting us big girls up for failure- of course we’re not going to look like that…add another layer of depressing sighs.

I remember seeing an article a while back about a store chain introducing “plus sized mannequins” to model its clothing.  YAY! I thought…until I finished with the article, which can be found here:  http://www.bustle.com/articles/40006-are-plus-size-mannequins-helping-break-down-beauty-standards-or-making-them-worse

Since when is a size 12 considered plus size?  (In fact, I've found more than one resource that’s stated the average American woman is a size 14, thank you very much.  Do they actually buy the size 14’s?  Well, that seems to be a different story…) And then to rub salt in the wound, create a size 8 mannequin and call it plus size?  Jeez… thanks a lot, retailers.

In this journey of self-awareness we’re taking through WLS, I would encourage all of us (myself included) to remember that it really IS our journey, not anyone else’s.  No one can control how we feel or react, unless we allow them to.  Everyone’s surgery is different, as is how everyone’s body will react to it. 
Chin up, everyone.  If someone’s losing faster than you, hooray for them- celebrate alongside of them!  You’ll get there too, and so will I.  Until then… I’m All About That Bass… 






Whether you’re losing or stalling, WLS can be challenging for all of us, and it’s hard not to compare ourselves to each other or images we see in the media!  Want to talk or have questions?  You can always reach me at: suzemuze4life@gmail.com.  Until next time, my friends, stay the course- you’ll be glad you did!